Monday, 7 December 2015


This is what they call a rant. Enjoy.

Lingering in the back of my head lately is this feeling of frustration. That I am dissatisfied by a whole lot of things. I'm frustrated with work, the pointless carrying of heavy boxes and quite literally a hand-to-mouth income. I'm frustrated with not finding other jobs.
So I'm also frustrated with not getting it extended and so soon loosing this stable income.

I'm frustrated with not having experienced much of what Australia has to offer in my almost 5 months here. I'm frustrated with not having enough money to travel all I want. I'm frustrated with the time given up to gain some money. I'm frustrated with how rarely I go to the gym despite almost desperately wanting to. I'm frustrated that I'm so exhausted after work everyday that making food and chatting to my flatmates is an achievement. I'm frustrated that my body is too weak, that my feeble attempts at yoga are laughable, that my hips, thighs, leg are as flexible as a 75-year-old's. I'm frustrated that I'm not fit enough, that my stomache reacts to pretty much everything I eat these days. I'm frustrated with my awful migraine that never goes away (and always reappears when I need it the least). I'm frustrated with my hair (and I'm consequently cutting it tomorrow first time in 8 months, like a decent rebellious teenager).

I'm frustrated with relationships, friendships and lack thereof. I'm frustrated that I don't have time enough to nurture them. I'm frustrated that I'm so far away from loved ones and that I miss certain Glasgow walks and talks that always cheered me up. I'm frustrated that I haven't found some devotion I'm pretty good at - or anything cool at all: surfing, running, yoga, dancing, building things. I'm frustrated with not being convinced about choices for the future. I'm frustrated that my landlord makes me clean a house that's pretty fucking clean already.

I'm frustrated by mainstream macro and stupid political policies. And even more so with the geniuses running Fort Europa. And with pundits who don't know what they're talking about, mindlessly ranting regardless.

I'm frustrated that my lovely computer screen cracked, that it's now in repairs and that it refuses to connect to my house WiFi. I'm frustrated with having to do dishes when I've been making delicious food. I'm frustrated that I don't have time and energy to post on more engaging topics.

Well, well. I have a day off work tomorrow, it's pay-day and I get my Uni grades from this semester.  Besides, I live in one of the most beautiful places around. Joakim, shut up and dance. Seriously.

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